Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Today's paper was an average wrap. I definitely know that I could have done way better. I had an A- for the OCAS which means that if I score above 70 in this paper, I can easily expect an 'A' grade for this module and to make things really so beautiful, it's Organisational Psychology - alot of concepts from Management of Business was incorporated into this module and people who know me well know that Management of Business was my forte. So technically, the 'A' grade was supposed to be in my bag but of course, my plans got foiled. Had a real tough week and I had a major hard time trying to block out too many thoughts and yes, I got distracted a tad too many times. The focus wasn't there at all. The entire 'mugging' period was a waste of time. Really feeling so fucking fucked up that I had to forgo that 'A' grade all because I failed to block out the thoughts that arised from all this problems. It's not that I am trying to exhibit the typical paper-chasing Asian mentality here but honestly, I hate to settle for mediocrity when I know that I can achieve even better. A chance to pull up my GPA and yea ...it feels as if my dreams and hopes has vanished into thin air. Let's hope for the best.
Anyways, The Cuties are really so cute ! Each of them took turns to message me today. It was really so cute to see the way they were initiating all those conversations. Thank you dearest cuties. Appreciate it loads. YK and I were actually sitting for the same paper and YK ended early and waited till I was done just so that we could take the same bus home. Such small acts comes a long way. Thank you. So we've planned to head out for a 'tarik' session this Thursday. Need a small break to catch up with D and H also and sadly it was H's birthday today and paavam, he was down for Moral Compass and he had to do a certain question which really made us laugh out backside out. See Moral Compass is a very interesting module but the examination questions can be a major killer.
I saw a certain Vasantham celebrity who took the same paper as me. I saw his name on the board and realised it was him. He walked it like a Superstar - with shades on (for a 7.30 pm paper) and 1 pen. I was like "ada paavi, exam-kkum eppadi thaan varunnumaa ?". Hahhaa it was funny because he sat beside me and it was hard not to notice each other. So while we were doing our examination, some Indian dude's handphone rang and the song "Yeh Unnathaan" started playing. It was freaking loud and the whole hall reverberated with those heavily auto-tuned voice. At that juncture, I really swear I felt like just standing up and breaking into a dance. Just like how some loosu might do it. Really, I got no idea why such a weird thought came into my mind. Half way into the exam, I felt like using the toilet. Estimated 2 minutes and ran to the toilet with the examiner and while walking back to the exam hall, we ended up cracking some jokes and I walked into the exam hall with a smile. I noticed that some people were looking at me so fiercely (I guess there were amidst some serious thinking) and there I was, walking into the hall like a weirdo with a smile on my face. Lol.
Anyways, after much serious consideration, I've finally opened up a private blog for myself and I think the URL is supercool - vitzspeaks.blogspot.com ! Yes, so basically it's a keeper of my insecurities, my thoughts, my vents and everything else. Initially I wanted to privatise this blog of mine but then again, I have too many memories locked into each and every tab and I know that I do have a steady flow of readers who do read my old posts. So yes. I'll be blogging out general stuff here and more comprehensive ones on my personal blog.
Late last night, Dad gave 2 punch dialogues and OMG, it came right at the nick of time. It's like I was so shocked he said those 2 dialogues. The context may be different but the intended message is a major take-away. And recalling it now, I was talking to GK last night and strangely he told me the same thing too. I just turn it away but when Dad said it, I really started to think so deeply about it. Maybe it had to make sense, especially at this juncture.
Anyways, I'm mentally and physically tired and I know that I definitely cannot catch up on my sleep debt at least until 25th. I just can't wait to like sleep it all out. To take a chill pill. But once 25th is out, I swear I am going to turn the "beast mode" on. Hahaha, not weights la. But a very strict programme.
You got coloured @
12:47 am