This is a new beginning for me. Hence, a picture that depicts it all.
A new horizon that presents a multitude of challenges. Lord, please be with me.





Technically, I got promoted to a new firm. Awesome pay, awesome building with awesome view and extra awesome everything else. Good colleagues too. Many interns are like working on attachments here. Its nice to listen to their POV too. For some reason, I wished that I was enrolled in NUS's Law. Dammit.


Anyways, something has been bothering me - alot. I'm really very pissed with the whole Danz Arena event.


First and foremost, I was really pissed off with myself. Due to God's good blessings, I snapped my knee twice in a week prior to Danz Arena and I taped up my knee really tightly that I couldn't bend it at ease. But obviously my passion overrode the pain. Honestly, fuck ! I want a fucking new knee. A bitch slammed into my knee and dislocated it and what happened ?. She managed to continue playing floorball while I had to suffer in pain. Medical expenses chalked up and to-date my knee is not stable. Thanks to her, I can't even dance as per my heart's wish ! And please, I do know that NOT MANY understand what my passion means to me. Some may believe that I am being over-dramatic but let me say this : FUCK YOU ! Wanna trade shoes with me and perhaps you may understand what my passion exactly means ?.


I was really very disappointed with Maalika. I loathe her comments. Like totally. Honestly, mid way into the dance, I was flustered with anger because I saw the coordination going hay-wire. My hopes dashed when I collided into Guru and Nesh. I was like "Damn, that's it". But completing the dance was my priority then. Maalika mentioned that our coordination was out. That I totally agree but what I cannot possibly digest is, the fact that she believed that we should have done a "happy dance". Our friends who were the spectators mentioned that Maalika criticised all those who had elements of anger/ghostly theme/funeral possession. She seemed to favour a whole load of happy dance. I remember her saying "Why so much of anger for a dance". Frankly I felt like telling her "try dancing for a rebel song like Kodu Potta with a damned smile and happiness ! Like what the hell ? If she had wanted a happy dance then please, for heaven's sake, you should have written "happy/happiness" as the theme for Danz Arena 2011 ! And finally, dance is about expressing your feelings. If she feel that barathanaathiyam allows her to express her feelings then good for her. So does that mean she criticise hiphop dancers ?. Well, her comment was "Do a happy dance. No reason for wanting to have a message through your dance". So next time, I am going to put a full-fledged kuthu song and if she asks me for the theme, I'll say "HAPPY DANCE".


Also, certain groupmates disappointed me - that I'll have to deal with later. Even the show was hella' disappointing ! Especially the mystery round - I really have no comments for Maalika's comments again. I think the mystery round wasn't planned properly. All I can say is, luckily we didn't get "Holey Holey". Last minute the management changed it to a remixed version ! No planning ! The whole plan seemed soo messy.


Last but not least, I am really pissed with an immoral idiot called Nazriin. Well she and her group of friends came to taunt us for Danz Arena. I knew that they would be present. Anyways I am not embarrassed or whatsoever at all. Really. We took part in a competition and we did our best and we got judged by a judge who seemed to have woken up on the wrong side on that unfateful day.


While Maalika was giving comments, I did overheard Nazriin using vulgarities and hurled remarks at us. Well her tiny ass simply itches for trouble. She has always tried to taunt us even while we practised at RP. So that wasn't uncalled for. But she using vulgarities was definitely antagonising. Trust me, I was really pissed. I know for sure that even some of the dancers from my group were looking for her after the dance. We were really pissed.


And soon after, Gaya saw her and another idiot called Divya at Bishan. This time Nazriin said "Look, that's our P Susheela walking away". And both she and Divya blocked Gaya's way. Seriously, what does Nazriin really want ?. You want to taunt us, taunt us on the stage. Not at a public place. Did she even stop to think what would have happened to her if Gaya decided to react ?. I wish Gaya just slapped her. I don't advocate all these but for the very first time in my life, I am really itching to slap that Nazriin. Well, very honestly, she has crossed her limits.


Sometimes I really feel that what people said about my dancers was just so true ! No offence meant, I'm not talking about all the dancers. But people had alot to say about those troublemakers. Sometimes, by pursing after a passion and having people from the "other end" to be part of it and to support it, seems to really pull down my objectives. I am not ostracising any groups or lifestyle of people. But these idiots have proved otherwise. They showed me that they were literally the people from the "other end" - in terms of their habits, lifestyle and intelligence. I am not putting anyone down - not at all. But those idiots, deserve this ! Imagine, what kind of surroundings these Nazriin must have been through that she can compromise on the very roots of her upbringing by using such insults in a public place ?! Eeeks ! I totally regret having them part of my passion group. Thank God, they're out ! PHEW !!


And oh, how did I forget ?. Some idiots bought tickets from a member of my group and had the cheek to even say "tell Vithiya, not to be too happy. I didn't buy the tickets to support her". What nonsense ? Honestly Jai, I am definitely not craving for YOUR support. You can keep it where it may be deemed as important. You don't mean a thing to me and honestly you supporting me or not, simply doesn't make any difference to me at all. So please, fuck off. Or maybe, PLEASE GROW UP, JAI ! I do know that you or your spies read my blog and I simply wanted this to be heard (or rather, read).


Summing it all up, I wish I don't have to stick to "wayward" methods to get my passion going. Sometimes, it really upsets me when I have the recipe and different cooks explore their methods and end up spoiling the food ( for those who read my blog, ask me what I mean by this instead of assuming nonsense).

A shoulder to cry onto. The tears are the same but I don't want a different shoulder. Sometimes you would be too comfortable with only 1 shoulder that even if substitutes are readily available, you wouldn't want them. Well, life and its controversial twists.


Well, thank God I met my brotherlove yesterday. I managed to wear my heart on my sleeve. I felt so much better. But the thing is, time doesn't stand still all the time and it keeps moving forth and when that happens, just too many happenings takes place and even before you know it, you'll somehow travel back to square 1. Why ?


I simply have too many "WHY ?" (s).


Anyways, earlier on, myself and Mr E were watching "Annoying Orange". Mr E uses that to teach his students. So we ended up sharing our thoughts. He asked me a question and I got it right ! Yay !


By the way, I deleted about 800+ friends from facebook and I am still left with about 1000+. God ! A lesson learnt, Vitz.


Anyways, the funniest thing is, I travelled all around and got entangled in a mess to only return to the same road. Why ? See, I told you that I have too many 'why(s)' right ?


Also, everyone knows but they act. Like I said earlier, its always easy to redeem yourself. Just do all the mistakes and then live up to what they have always wanted you to be and soon after, your mistakes/sins will all be forgotten. Not blaming, but disappointed.


And guess what, Charlie Chaplin is an intelligent dude. Seriously. I love his "I always like walking in the rain, so no one can see me crying". You know idiots would say that crying is only for weaklings - but hello, we are no robots. We have emotions built into us. And guess what, only one thing makes us- humans weak. Only 1 thing and it is, love. When you shower alot of love, affection and concern on someone and when it goes unappreciated or trampled upon, your heart breaks, You may be one helluva strong asshole but you will break down and cry like a baby because it simply - hurts. For some people, you can feel the stab of pain in your heart and feel it literally break into smithereens. Haha.


I just hide behind the tears of a clown.

Yes, I'm holding to the broken one, just as tightly.


Not having a good day. My mind is wandering and its just too fatal. Well, can't quite hold my ground especially when there's a huge crack there.


I can't believe my own eyes, things that I see and things that I am seeing. Well, God, can I talk to you ? I really want to.

Thoughts flowing like a river ....

Hello to my fans & to my haters.


Long absence, yes I know. Well, been caught up with alot of commitments. Anyways, I'll be making my TV debut tomorrow on Vasantham. I'll be doing a lead role for this docu-drama entitled "Ennule" and it will be telecasted at 10pm. The trailer brought some good reception and I am really excited to watch the whole drama. Loads of hardwork, sweat and blood are like peppered all over the scenes and I hope, I did justice to my role. Please keep the support following. Am truly humbled by the comments.




To be, real soon.

One of my favourite picture. Syed, the cameraman with good visions and Kumaran, really a talented director. I really adore his work. So much of talent and that much of dedication at this young age. I should really emulate his workrate !

Anyways, for some very strange reasons, 3/4 of my dreams are being achieved now. I mean, I really wanted it and I did toil hard for it but when I really wanted it, it didn't quite happen but when I was left in my own hermit, everything seems to fall into place. I don't quite understand the relation but I am happy, not truly contented due to the void that was created in my heart, but I'm happy.

Of course, it came to my attention that some haters have decided to use "old school" methods to tarnish my image, reputation and name. Dearest haters, if I were any younger, I would have taken the time to rebutt each and every point that you had to mention on my chatbox but alas, time is of essence to me now. I appreciate the fact that you want to show your hatred so vividly, well, I'm touched. Continue hurling insults as much as you can because at the end of the day, you'll become the real laughing stock. My blog lacked some entertainment and I am touched by your work rate. Keep that going. Cheers.

" You may know my name. But you don't know my story. So shut up, or end up being laughed at."

Things that I would like to share with my well-wishers and haters :-

1) I can finally call myself an Undergraduate. A chance to fulfill my dad's dream.

2) I've been doing alot of collaborations with a range of talented people. More projects are underway and I shall keep one and all notified via Facebook.

3) I've managed to expand my network of talented people and my friend and I have mapped out some good plans. More projects are underway.

4) I'll be directing a short film real soon. My short film will carry a very strong message and some real-life incidents will be adding into it. I'm not doing this to blemish anybody's name but to send out a strong message to our community.

5) Dance Arena 2011 is underway. A newer team, a newer plan. Actually, a pathetic group decided to challenge us and since I love challenges, I have decided to take it up. Infact, all of us are boiling with rage but this rage shall be extinguished when we meet on STAGE. My passion can never be eliminated by your mere words of insult. I shall show you what real challenge means. Bring it on, the rage is still burning and the stage is all set !

Anyways for some reason, I feel that its easy to go around making mistakes and "redeem" yourself very easily. All you simply have to do is to act lovingly towards your loved ones and your mistakes will be forgotten overtime. Honestly, I am so disappointed with the whole series of events. Truly am.

I guess, I've been literally missing in action as far as my blog is concerned. Eh ? Anyways, let me share this small venture of mine. I'm collaborating with SSVPP Productions & ELH Productions for a music video. The poster is up and do support me in this venture. Oh, its a Rap music video by the way.

You know, I haven't been myself for months. There is like a million of thoughts zooming through my head. For some reason, I feel like I have transformed into a different person. Something like a ghost of my past. I am trying hard to become the person I used to be but it has been a far cry. The face of the past is looking at me from a great distance. Why ? I asked the same question too, but I never got the answer and I wonder if I will ever get the answer. Frankly, I am tired of listening to everyone's "it all happens for a reason" bullcrap. Just shut the hell up. Its easy to say it but its not easy to be embroiled in such a sticky situation. I miss being happy.

The best thing is, I have no idea. Really no idea and at the same time I cannot buy it. Not that I am in denial but its just that I don't quite understand. But who is going to hear my confusion ? Lol, it has to be buried within me. Maybe, that's how is has to be ?

But one thing, I understood the meaning of smithereens.

I miss the smile of a child.

Oh btw, I know that some gossip-scavengers have been trying hard to get hold of details about my life and I did delete and block them off my Facebook. Seriously, all you pea brains, go all out and condemn me as much as you want. I am really not bothered. I am merely saying this here just to let you know that you can by all means continue to gossip as much as you want.

And,I was down with a bad sinus and was killed by its symptoms. I had severe pounding headache (that never stopped. The pain cannot be stopped but only reduced with the aid of painkillers), blocked ear - it affected my balance, blurry vision, diarrhoea (cos' the phlegm doesn't get get drained the normal way but rather it flows through the back of the throat and into the stomach and it triggers diarrhoea), fever, severe cough, continuous sneezing and wheezing and breathlessness. In short, I really suffered. The doctor finally gave me the nasal spray and it worked magic. If the nasal spray didn't work, I would have to go under the knife. Thank God it worked. PHEW !

" You are not meant to dance to the tune of the world, but to the song of your heart".
- Excellent ?


Anyways, I haven't disappeared to "anywhere". Its just that my life has become too much of a routine now. Sometimes, I hardly have time to catch up on a lot of things. For instance, I have too many movies in my I-pod and I don't have the time to watch them all. I bought a myriad of books and am yet to read them too. Technically, I miss being me.


A little update on life :- Guess good things sometimes will have to come to an end. Circumstances are devilish and they require greater amount of strength to fend off. Guess, exhaustion came into place and reality slapped me across my face. Anyways, "Sikh ja ke pyar karne de val, jhoote sang sade ik ik pal". If you can comprehend this, then good. If you can't, ask me. If I trust you, I shall tell you more. Other than that, good luck.


You know, sometimes I really hate being misinterpreted. Like for instance, I may like tomatoes. I may actually contemplate on buying it and may even stop by to take a look at it. And based on this actions alone, people may come to the conclusion of assuming that I am there to steal those tomatoes. Now that really frustrates me. I mean wise men have mentioned that "Assumption makes an ASS out of YOU and ME. So we should stop assuming and instead, learn how to clarify. Yet some people simply don't choose to follow this.


But honestly, what can I do ?. I am tired of standing up for myself at times. I mean I would stand up for myself and even this would bring the wrong impression to people. So what's the point ?


Hah, anyways, the year is coming to an end. Frankly, I wish 2011 would be a really better year. I'm tired of hoping for a better year especially when it doesn't turn out to be that way. I guess I'm horribly tired of too many things at this juncture. Lol. Maybe I should start ranting about a few funny happenings ... :P


#1 : I've kinda planned out my New Year resolution and its really short and simple. I mean it may seem subtle but for the trained mind, it speaks a million words. My New Year Resolution is : "Live, Laugh, Love". Simple.


#2 : Yesterday happened to be a very emotional day for me. Nahh, don't worry. I got my bonus. And the thing is, my boss gives me a Maybank cheque and I need to exchange it for cash and all. So for the first time, I literally had wads of cash in my hand. I mean normally the amount in the bank account would like good but to have it all in your hands spell a different feeling. I ended up going to the nearest toilet. I locked myself up in a solitary cubicle and literally spent each and every second kissing, smelling and saying thank you to the wads of cash. My hard-earned money, dude !! Haha.


#3 : My friends know that I love toys and carebears and they got me some :)). Seriously, I am freaking addicted to White carebears. I have 4 carebears + 1 bear on my bed and now a new White Carebear to the collection. Can you believe, I sleep with 6 bears on my bed ? :P


#4 : I am beginning to appreciate the fact that I have 2 phones. Haha. While I use one solely for the purpose of taking pictures and the other for the purpose of making/attending calls. Well I am always on the phone, in a conference. And the battery life in my touch screen phone sucks. So I resorted to using a Nokia (highly recommended for NSF) phone for the calling purposes :P.


#5 : I went for a shoulder-neck massage for the first time and oh my God. The experience was too over-whelming. Well ok, I shall be really honest here. Alright ?. Firstly, I had a plethora of stress knots in my shoulder area. So it was really freaking painful as the masseuse tried to release the stress knots on my shoulder. Phew !! And I ended up tearing. Also my G-spots happen to be at my neck area and haha many a time, yea .. haha. I didn't know massaging can get so sensual. Haha lastly, I almost urinated out of pain ! Hahaha. Especially when the masseuse was trying to remove those stress knots. So immediately after the massage, I ran to the toilet :P.


Anyways, I am literally in office, trying to type this out. I started off in the afternoon but now, I cannot really focus in finishing it since I've got tonnes and tonnes of work to do. So for now, I shall call it quits. Haiz.


I'll be going bugis for some shopping later. X'mas, what to do ?. And I'm suddenly down with fever. These fever pangs are a total pain in the ass. Damn, nothing can stop me from enjoying my X'mas parties. They are starting from tomorrow !! Wooohooo.


MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL :))

Vithiya 'Vitz'

11 Jan 1987

Millennia Institute

Hockey & Floorball

spitfire_v_87@hotmail.com

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